Well, I talked to Tatsuchichi, a ToT member, and I got some weight off my back, however, it didn't entirely help... so, if I can see the keyboard through my teary eyes, I will try to explain...
*Deep Breath*
Well, on June 9th, school got out, and it was 3rd period, we got out after 4th.
I was talking to my friend, who has been my friend since pre-school, and me and him were having a good time, and, My other friend Catlin, came near us, and said. "Grumley, don't fucking talk to that bitch! You know what she did to us!"
Of course, I didn't know what the hell that wakko beyotch was talking about.
And Grumley (The only boy I have ever truley loved) Said, "Oh yeah, why the fuck did you tell the principal that me and Catlin fucked around last night!"
When I heard that, I dropped something, something glass, and it broke, and everyone looked. I looked down, and started balling my eyes out. I was in the 7th grade class, becuase I was in the Study Hall with the 7th graders, and, I looked at catlin and said, "How could you do that to me! You have a god damn boyfriend, what is your fucking problem! I didn't say anything to anyone!"
After I said that, I looked at Grumley, turned and ran out of the room, my other friend, who got held back in 3rd grade, Matt, tried to stop me, but I pushed him and his girlfriend out of the way.
I have cried everyday now since then. And since I'm changing schools, I'll never see him again. I have even thought about suicide, I came about a second close to it, but, I couldn't bring myself to do it.
I really need some support, I'm an emotional wreck, and I don't think I can handle all of this crying anymore. Should I just kill myself, and end it all, or should I try to find out how to get a hold of him... Or, should I just forget it...
I am totally at a loss....